Ending the hiatus at last

If you've kept up with this blog at all, you may be wondering what I've been doing for the last six months since the Tyler Rose Half. The short answer is: moping. I've been moping and feeling sorry for myself. I've gotten most of that out of my system now. I'll be posting some new fitness and nutrition goals next week.

For a more detailed break down of my six month pity party:

Race Day:

Aka, the "purpose" of this entire blog. It didn't go as planned. During our first 9 mile run (about a month from the half), I had some kind of physical break down where my hip gave out and my guts went crazy. I had to stop running about 6 miles when my gastrointestinal distress became so severe that I feared an imminent pants-disaster. We stopped at a gas station but I couldn't go to the bathroom. So, we tried to run again (because I'm hard headed) and that's when my hip just gave out. I didn't feel anything snap or pop, it just suddenly became loose and wobbly. I hobbled down to the nearest Dairy Queen and made it to the bathroom just in time. Then we hobbled back home about 3 miles. The next day I could barely walk. Awesome.

I made a lot of bad bad decisions that run. Looking back, I should have stopped for good the first time. I should've called a friend to come pick us up. I should've refueled better and eaten more carbs before the run. I should've kept up with my strength training, since I knew my hips were vulnerable to injury.

I basically rested for the next two and a half weeks, and then attempted some 30 minute walks along our normal running paths. Although I still had some serious hip discomfort, I was too bone-headed to give up. By the day of the half, I felt "well" enough to convince my husband that we should walk the half. So we did. It was incredibly cold (like, almost freezing). It was slow going, but my hip and my fear kept us from running. We did end up running the last mile, which was pretty encouraging. All in all, it took us about three and a half hours to cross the finish line... pretty abysmal. Because we got there so late, the race organizers had run out of finisher's medals. Ugh. We did eventually get them in the mail.

They looked like this:

After the race:
I didn't feel like running EVER again. I felt incredibly discouraged, stupid, and worthless (never mind the fact that I had just walked 13.1 miles after training for months, something that should have made me feel proud of myself). It just seemed so pointless. I spent about two months doing nothing aside from some karate and half-hearted walks. Needless to say, I put on a bit of weight. Then the holidays came, and I put on some more weight. Yay!

At some point, I decided to get off my butt and do something. I landed on this strength training program from Kara Goucher, courtesy of Tony Salazar. It's specially designed for runners and it is a beast. I made it through one full round (four weeks of increasingly heavy weights + one rest week), put on a lot of muscle, and felt pretty awesome about myself. During my first week of round two, I screwed up by not eating enough calories (again) which resulted in me almost passing out in the middle of a set.

Shortly after this experience, my husband and I traded various flu strains back and forth for about 6 weeks. Then I got a little depressed. Then, we had this ridiculous month of crazy weather changes that threw my poor joints into a tailspin.

Then I went out of town for ten days for a conference in New York. Then I got sick again.

Aaaaaand now I'm here. Sick and tired of being sick and tired, as they say. Last week, my husband and I started a new round of the Kara Goucher workout. Next week, I'm going to start a weird paleo food challenge called the Whole30 Challenge. So there you go.

Words of encouragement are welcome, as are any hilarious stories of failure that you might have.

Temporarily waylaid

Here's a quick and dirty update, since the blog has been kind of quiet.

August 25th, we had an 11.5 mile run planned. It was pretty disastrous, with major blood sugar problems, GI crises, hip pain, and gear issues. Also, the lingering after effects of my spring bout with bronchitis were present today; I struggled to breathe even with my inhaler. I couldn't get my blood sugar balance to a good point. I don't think I prepared nutritionally for the run very well (loooots of church casserole), so I'm going to have to try some different strategies for our next long run. I'm really at a loss for what kinds of food will properly fuel me on long treks.  So, the short description of this run is that it really really sucked.

We ran about 4.5 miles at a pretty slow pace, and then stopped in at the gas station on Loop and Paluxy. My tummy wouldn't cooperate at said gas station, so we started up again but had to stop shortly thereafter. We walked down to the Dairy Queen in the French Quarter parking lot where my tummy WOULD cooperate (in a very urgent way).

About 7.25 miles in, after 4/4.5 running and a couple miles of walking), Matt encouraged me to start up again. It was a pretty pitiful pace, but we did make it almost 2 more miles this way. Although it was miserable, I drew deep on my mental and physical reserves. I think it was a valuable experience. By the end of the run, my hips were screaming. I hadn't been paying much attention to my form while I was hobbling along, and I think I threw something out of whack. The issue is on the outside of my left hip, and it seems to be some kind of inflamed bursa or ITB issue. I experienced a lot of looseness in my hip, if that makes sense, where it kept trying to pop out of the joint while I was walking around during the following week.

I rested and did some light rehab (stretching, core strengthening, icing) for the next 10 days.

On Wednesday the 5th, I attempted to run around the indoor track on my lunch break at UT Tyler.  It started out okay and I kept up a decent pace (for me). However, about 3/4 miles in my hip starting seriously cramping up. I made myself finish the mile, just in case the discomfort subsided. It did not. It got worse. So, I stopped at 1 mile (10:30min pace) and grumbled back to the office.

This last Saturday, the 8th, Matt and I went for a real easy run along our normal 30 minute course. We made it about 2.01 miles in 23 minutes. My hip started cramping up about 1.5 miles in, but I was able to walk it out for a block or so. About 2 miles in, I had to walk again because the cramping/soreness had increased significantly. There was no coming back from this walk break; I was limping and grimacing the whole way home. And now I remember that I forgot to ice it afterwards.

That's where I am today. We'll probably try to run the easy 30 minute course today and hopefully the weather will stay nice. Last Saturday's run was supposed to be 12.5 miles, but we ran approximately 2. I'm not sure what is going to happen to our training plan, or the half-marathon itself.

We are registered for the Tyler Half, and on the suggestion of a fellow Daily Miler I signed us up for the Mellew Four Seasons Challenge. So, even if this first half marathon is a big ol' disappointment (which I reckon it will be), we'll have three more to train for this year. I'll be trying out some new strategies then.

For anyone reading this week, thank you. For anyone who takes the time to ask me, "How's that running thing going?", thank you. For everyone who commiserates with my misery and mishaps, thank you. I appreciate your encouragement more than you know. I'm grateful to be a part of this running community, even if my contributions are pretty pitiful.

Onward and upward, folks.

"At least I don't have to run in Victorian garb"

Yesterday's run was a bit of a trial. It was 98 on the heat index when we left the house (at 9:00 pm, mind you), and I've been feeling like I'm coming down with some kind of respiratory thing for a few days. Also, because of the weather or hormones or something, my joints have been hurting a LOT lately. The big culprits are in my hands, feet, right knee, left hip, and right shoulder.

I got pretty discouraged and said something like, "Matt, I just don't think I'll ever reach a time in my life when working out is not painful and emotionally draining. I mean, sometimes there are other rewards but I'll just never be one of those people who loves to exercise for the sake of exercising." And, you know, he responded in the most honest way he could with something like, "Yep. You're probably right. But it's like work: you've got to do it".

The self-pity continued for a while. I was feeling really bummed and the threat of angry tears was rising with every step. Around the half way mark, I came to a sort of emotional crisis point, where I needed to turn my thoughts around or risk quitting right there.

So, as a mental/motivational exercise, I started listing off things I should be grateful for in the course of this lame unsatisfying run. Here is part of that list, with links and pictures.

• At least I live in a time where I am ALLOWED to run this distance I'm training for. (Katherine Switzer in 1967 Boston Marathon)
  
  
• And my doctor won't try to tell me that my uterus will fall out, that I'll grow a mustache, or that I'll age prematurely.
• I live in a country where it is not illegal for me, as a woman, to exercise.
•  I live in a neighborhood and country where I don't have to literally dodge bullets during practice runs.
• I don't have to run against Olympic athletes while fasting.
• I don't have to run in Victorian garb.
  
• Or in a hijab (I respect women who do so as a decision of personal faith and piety; I am extremely heat sensitive and would feel especially miserable).
  
• I don't have to run home from the market with groceries on my head.
  
• Or run with a baby.
  
• Or run from a bear.
  
• I still have both legs, and I don't have to learn to run again after losing them.
  
• My husband is not a super athletic jerk.
  
  
  
• I don't have to deal with atrocious air pollution. 
• I don't have to run on tundra or through deserts. 
• I don't have to worry about landmines, or morality police. 
• I don't have some kind of disorder which makes my bones fragile like glass, or prevents me from feeling when I'm injured. 
• I don't have to run from militants or risk being raped or maimed when I go on practice runs. 
• I don't have to worry about being mistaken for a robber and shot in gentrified neighborhoods.
• I don't have to run to entertain my corporate overlords.

So, that's part of my list. What are you grateful for? All reasons are acceptable, from the most mundane to the most ridiculous.

Catching up, and a new record

I've been pretty silent on here for a few weeks, but rest assured that we haven't given up. I got a bit bogged down by the blogging process.

Here's what you've missed, in the meantime:

• Wednesday, July 18 run - a 30 minute run that got cut short due to hip pain; kept up a decent pace though.
• Vacation in Miami - in which we endeavored to run, but failed (Saturday July 21, Monday July 23, and post-vacation recovery on Wednesday July 25)
• Saturday, July 28 run - 8 mile target, just under 6.5 run (making this the new longest run ever). Run/walk of 10min/3min was adjusted to 8min/5min to deal with hip pain, headache, and tummy ache. Ended up stopping 5 minutes earlier than planned because I completely depleted my glycogen stores and just couldn't run any farther. It was a surreal experience which taught me that: 
• a) I need to have a plan for fueling on runs longer than 1 hour
• b) I am infinitely tougher than I used to be; seriously, this was the most out-of-body miserable experience I have ever put myself through
• c) My husband makes an incredible long-distance runner; he isn't affected by this stuff at all
• d) Old Jacksonville Hwy inside the loop has great sidewalks
• e) It's time to buy that CamelBak
• f) I still hate the heat, and probably always will, but it doesn't have to keep me from running
• Tuesday, July 31 run - a 30 minute run fraught with whining and puttering and grunting. I learned that:
• a) Some runs are just really hard for no reason.
• b) My attitude problems aren't gone, but they are getting better (and Matt allows me enough grace to make up for it)
• c) I need to be mindful of my tendency to fall into a slow-pace rut
• d) Accordingly, it's time to kick it up a notch
• e) I still let my emotional environment dictate my physical output
• f) Sometimes my feelings are wrong.

With the Saturday run, we wrapped up what I consider another week towards our bribe-thermometer (lost a week while in Miami).

It's been really tough here lately. I know lots of people experience seasons of discouragement in their training, so I'm not alone. I've been struggling physically and mentally for the last few runs. What have you done to get through periods like this?

It won't always be easy

Today's run was soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo lame. Yes. That many Os.

The good:Overall speed was acceptable (11:24 pace overall). We finished. I did not puke or anything else. I got out and ran even though I seriously didn't want to or feel like it.

The bad:
So much burping. Eww. My initial pace was a slow, pitiful crawl. Everything hurt and my legs felt like lead. I repeatedly wanted to quit and/or curl up in a ball and cry. Also, it felt really really hot (it was not that hot, maybe like 90F). Humidity was about 60%.

The ugly:
About 10 minutes in as we were getting ready to start the first speed interval, I accidentally yelled at Matt. I didn't feel angry at him before or after it happened, so we were both taken by surprise. It was basically one of those instances where I had to repeat myself because Matt couldn't hear me, and I let my tone get out of control.

With that run and all its emotional baggage behind me, I want to step back and evaluate some stuff.
Somehow, miraculously, this crazy plan is working. I've never done anything like this in my life. It is hard and unnatural. But folks, I just ran 5 3/4 miles on Saturday. I. Did. That. It's unbelievable.
It's been over a three and a half years since the first time I ran a mile. I've done a lot of things wrong from that day until now. Even my incredibly sweet, encouraging, inhumanely optimistic husband had doubts when we started this training plan. But it's working. I am experiencing little to no joint pain/inflammation on my runs and I have avoided injuring myself in a major way (so far).

So, let's take a look at what I'm doing differently THIS TIME.

New Sam	Old Sam
Has a set routine*	Did whatever, whenever.
Tailors strength training for running**	See above.
Has a running plan	See above.
Has a support system (that’s you folks & Matt)	Ran solo.
Varies running environments	Ran on a treadmill. Every time.
Has a concrete goal	Dreamed about stuff and things.
Listens to her body and rests when necessary	Rigidly adhered to unrealistic benchmarks.

^aka "got injured a lot"

*Routine:
5 minutes (minimum) of walking and dynamic stretches before every run
5 minutes (minimum) cool down walk and static stretches after every run
Cool shower post-stretch
Chocolate milk post-run recovery drink
Ice as necessary

**Strength training:
Exercises include things like planks, side planks, side squats, one leg chair squats, lunges, four part crunches, the sun salutation routine, regular squats, chair dips, pilates push-ups, calf lifts, resistance band leg lifts (side, front, back). I also stretch my hips, plantar fascia, and hamstrings regularly during the day when I remember/make myself do it.

What are your secrets to success?

Checking in, nothing crazy

Well, our running schedule is still a bit wonky from last week.

This week's schedule is:

Monday Tuesday: 30 minutes
Wednesday Friday: 30 minutes
Saturday: 2.5 miles

We did get in a really good, solid 30 minute run on Tuesday (temperature was like 80 degrees, phenomenal). We kept up a pace of about 10:50, with a great attitude throughout. After 10 minutes of warm-up, we alternated between Matt's pace (1:00 minute, a bit speedier) and my pace (3:00 minutes, slow and steady). With each round, Matt got slightly faster, culminating in a really good clip on the last fast stretch.

I'm really looking forward to the 2.5 mile run this coming Saturday. Last weekend's long run was a 5 mile (ish).

The training plan I'm on has periodic tapers to prevent injury and allow my joints to rest. I also think there's a psychological benefit to it.

In any case, we're supposed to run 30 minutes tonight. It's pretty warm again, so we'll probably wait until after 8:00. Hopefully, I'll have good results to share.

Oh yeah! Almost forgot... I keep meaning to talk about the new running clothes I got. After picking up a technical tee from the East Texas Striders, I was converted. Up until that day, I'd been running in whatever clothes I had lying around (mostly cotton t-shirts, thick cotton workout capris, etc). HUGE mistake.

So, I've picked up another technical shirt (BCG from Academy), some basketball style shorts, some "compression" pants (maybe a bit too cheap to be really effective). I love them so much. I also bought a breathable hat, so I can keep the sun of my face/scalp without smothering.

UPDATE:
Uggggh... we just stepped out for our 2nd run of the week and found a GIANT LIGHTNING STORM waiting for us. It's converging from the east. I feel really upset. Should've checked the weather (I really should get in the habit of that anyway), because then I would've known to leave earlier. This is our normal time during the week (about 9:00pm).

Our gym closes at 5:00pm on Fridays, so we don't have an alternative planned. I feel really really wound up and antsy now.

The current plan is to run twice tomorrow (wahhhh), once in the morning and once in the evening. Sigh.

Tuesday run

Well, this has been a heck of a week. Monday's run got pushed to Tuesday, Wednesday's run got pushed to (hopefully) Thursday, and Saturday's run will follow 8 hours on my feet in front of a forge.

The plan for this week is basically:

Monday 30 min run
Wednesday 30 min run
Friday easy walk
Saturday 5 mile run

I've got a belt test on Thursday that has my head all out in left field. I keep having these nightmare scenarios where I strain my ankle running and can't test... or break my leg sparring and can't run... or any number of ridiculous scenarios.

Sigh. Ugh. Sigh. Anyway, the running's got to be done. This is week 8 of the blog (can you believe it?) with 16 weeks of training left. I feel like I'm at a crucial point in my mental training (and physical conditioning). I'm definitely getting into the habit of running even when I don't want to. This week has been more challenging than most, because I've had a lot of excuses at hand. My body feels fine, but my mental resolve is lagging.

Anyway, Tuesday's run went okay. I feel like it was a solid 30 minutes, although I wasn't thrilled about the pace. We ran after 9:00pm, and it was STILL 93F with a heat index of 99. Crazy.

I had a really rough time about 14 minutes in with a flare-up of abdominal pain (i.e. ovarian pain). It's a thing that comes up cyclically. Some months it is worse than others, and some months it doesn't appear at all. This was one of the first obstacles I encountered when I tried to start running a few years ago. I have no idea what it is, although I had a ton of tests done. On Tuesday night, I just kind of ran through it. I tried slowing down, which made it hurt worse. It subsided somewhat after I gulped some gatorade and sped up a little, paying special attention to my breathing.

Mostly, my joints were fine. The shin pain I was worried about really didn't give me any trouble, although I iced it post run just in case. My hip flexor was a little naggy, but not painful. Attitude was mostly really good (Matt complimented me on keeping my cool).

That's the sum of it for now. La ti da.

Attitude problems and first attempt at official course

First of all, I'd just like to say that I'm really looking forward to running in winter again. I am extremely sensitive to the heat and I lose a lot of electrolytes, even running short distances. Running in the summer for me is a Herculean task; running in the winter is a frolic (my husband hates it, though).

Saturday's run was no exception. At 90F, it was one of the cooler runs we've done this month (unfortunately). We ran the first part of the Tyler Rose Half Marathon official course (see our progress here). It's a heck of a course, all uphill and mostly in the sun for the first two miles. We also had to cross two pretty tricky intersections (Houston/Glenwood, Houston/Vine).

A little after two miles in, Matt's watch malfunctioned (we didn't realize it until about a mile later). We lost ALL of our time data. Neither of us had bothered to check the time when we started, so we had no way to extrapolate our actual pace. I did not handle this well at all. When he first broke the news, I was really confused... confusion then became panic, which turned into accusation, which slipped into despair. I very nearly quit within two blocks of him telling me, but finished in a petulant snit. I had not marked the miles very well, so we ended up running 3.11 (basically a 5k).

My attitude obviously hurt his feelings; some of the issue had to do with my tone (it's really really hard to sound sweet and obliging when you've been pounding up a steep hill for what seems like eternity). Most of it had to do with me taking him for granted.  That sucks.

He told me that it's hard enough for him to come out and run with me at a much slower pace, in adverse conditions he can't control (he's a treadmill runner), for a goal he never intended to set for himself (half-marathon race)... it's even harder when he feels like he has to persuade me out of a grumpy mood (almost) every time, or endure being griped at (near) constantly.

It's something I've got to work on, and stat. I don't have any excuse to treat my husband poorly, whether I'm aching and dehydrated from a tough run or dealing with elevated hormonal chaos. I definitely cherish his presence on the runs, even when things go wrong or I feel aggravated by communication breakdowns. I really don't know if I can reach this goal without him, but I sure know that I don't want to.

When we run, it's a rare opportunity for us to spend time with each other sans distractions. No electronics, no relatives, no strangers competing for aisle space, no traffic. I don't want to lose that or waste it.

In good news, I've raised $50 for myself: